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We should always keep in mind that SOME THINGS ARE BETTER LEFT UNSAID

Is it really better to dispel anger, frustration, and emotions? Will it make things easier for someone?

You have gone through a terrible break, of the kind where there is no howling, there is only silence in the air. We say words but we do not listen to them. So many memories are replaying and you wonder how you let him go so far. There are no words to say. Silence fills the room and it’s deafening. This silence, however, speaks; he speaks a million words a minute. He says the words that these two people are afraid to speak aloud. There remains the silence and the unfulfilled words remain there, suspended in the air where they will stay.

You have gone through this graduation phase and hugged your best friends, promising to stay in touch and vowing to stay friends forever. Four years have passed and Facetime calls have become informal text messages that have become a monthly check and are now becoming difficult to receive at Starbucks because no one can determine exactly where the friendship ended. You say hello and ask how they are, but you do not listen to their answer, because you think about the speed with which the barista must prepare your drink to be able to pretend that there was no promise. four years ago to stay best friends. Maybe one of you says you should catch up, empty promises that will not happen because too much time has passed and you do not know how you got there. So you go, coffee in hand, leaving words at the tip of the tongue again, without saying anything.

If you said what you felt if you removed those words from the air and let them speak, would you leave people better because of that? Would that help others to know what made you leave this relationship? Would it help others to understand why you think the friendship has ended? Maybe you have no reasons and there is nothing more to say on your part. How do you explain something that you can not even understand yourself? Do you make words so that the other feels like not leaving unspoken things? The truth is that things will always remain unsaid. That’s how we work.

You have a whole plan in mind about how the big conversation unfolds, and then the other person sends you an answer that you have not prepared. You planned the script in 14 different ways, trying to guess what the other person was going to say so you knew what to say, but they hit you with something you had not seen coming and now the script is in ruins and you do not know how ad lib. You leave the conversation without feeling a burden less than when you arrived there. When you get home, you think of all the other things you wanted to talk about and all the other things you would have liked to tell them. It’s too late now; you were supposed to leave everything on the table. Now the table is empty and the words remain in your mind.

In the movie version of your life, the public would know the words you never mentioned. Your voices would be commented on as you watch this person come out of your life forever. In the real version, this person considers that the situation is over and you too.

What you have not said will remain in your mind and in your heart. You will carry these thoughts and feelings throughout your life. You will think of this person when you hear a certain song or watch a certain movie and remember the good times.

You will not be reminded of everything you would like to tell them, these things will fade over time. No matter what conversation we have in life, there will always be lingering thought that we might have said or done something different. I live under the idea that everything is happening for a reason. It’s better to live as optimistic as possible.

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